VILLANELLE « April Halprin Wayland – Children's Book Author & Poet

x
PLEASE BELIEVE ME–a villanelle

by April Halprin Wayland

Did I pretend? Perhaps a dream…or was it true?

Thirteen. I was thirteen. It was July.

I swear I didn’t make it up…that night I flew.

The whole world slept, yes, all the birds, and even you.

I rose from bed, I raised the curtain, then I cried.

Did I pretend? Perhaps a dream…or was it true?

Something small, some fragrant flower the moon turned blue

pulled me that way—I don’t know why—I went outside.

I swear I didn’t make it up…that night I flew.

My nightgown filled, I lifted off, by then I knew.

I held it fast, I smelled it deep, I closed my eyes.

Did I pretend? Perhaps a dream…or was it true?

I thought of who would take my word—not even you.

That summer night my barefeet sailed the blackened sky.

I swear I didn’t make it up…that night I flew.

I promise everything I’ve written here is true.

By morning my whole life had changed—I can’t say why.

Did I pretend? Perhaps a dream…or was it true?

I swear I didn’t make it up…that night I flew.

x
The story behind the poem:
x
I realize that this villanelle is crazy-corny, but hey, we’re all friends here, right? When I was about thirteen, I padded outside on a warm summer night wearing my Lanz flannel nightgown, picked a small cluster of white flowers from the bush by our gate, breathed in their sweet smell…and flew. It was so real and so wonder-filled, I’ve never been able to get it out of my head.

I was walking Eli this morning and passed the same distinctive scent. I spun back to that night. I keep writing about it in different forms; today I thought I’d offer it up to the Poetry Gods in a villanelle.

Now it’s your turn. Villanelles are like solving a puzzle–great for a rainy day or a long train trip. Look at any villanelle–for example, Dylan Thomas’ Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night, written when his father died. Map it out. What lines repeat and where? Can you imitate the structure? Read it aloud as you go, to make sure the rhythm is right.x

Do you know the name of this bush?
These are the flowers that made me fly.